The alternative to Glastonbury

Ever felt like the one millennial that has never been to a music festival? You’re not alone.


I’ve got a confession. I’ve never been to a music festival. Don’t get me wrong I like some music and I like dancing, but I’ve just never found the money / time to buy tickets / group of friends to go with.

Mud, tents, porta loos and not being able to wash scare me. I just about managed a night camping in a forest, whilst doing the Duke of Edinburgh award at secondary school. After this frightening experience which involved me doing a dash through trees in the early hours of the morning to a toilet, the sergeant major overseeing this activity wrote in my logbook something like, “This one’s a dark horse, but I’m not too sure about her undertaking the Silver Award”. What he really meant to write was, “She’s high maintenance and a stay in a lavish hotel will suit her better than scrambling about in the countryside”.

So you can see why I am not overjoyed at camping. I do not like clammy armpits and unwashed hair. Yes – I know there’s dry shampoo (but, the longer I don’t wash my hair the darker it looks). I’ve toyed with the idea of festivals over the years but never seriously considered going. It’s the money. Too expensive – she says. Then the next week I’m ordering a dress off ASOS.

Maybe I’m too geeky for Glasto. This is something I realised when I got more excited about a new play based on Harry Potter coming to the West End than watching bands play at Glastonbury on the TV. When JK Rowling made this announcement I said to my mum and dad, “I need to go, I’m paying whatever the odds”. Cue images of me refreshing a website for tickets in the next few months or so, which is essentially what Glastonbury goers would have done.

After this, it dawned on me that I do have interests and I will pay over the odds to go to something. My interests just happen to be culture, theatre, literature, cocktails, good food and holidays. I have seen Hamlet twice and I would probably pay again to see Benedict Cumberbatch, who will be staring in a new production of the Shakespeare play.

For some reason I feel abnormal for wanting to pay to do this but not go to a music festival. I feel, like all other millennials I should be itching to dance in the mud and rain to The Libertines and drink my weight in cider. But, I’m not. Give me a sun lounger on South Beach in Miami with a copy of Grey by E.L. James and tickets to The Wizarding World of Harry Potter in Orlando and I’m happy!

So I guess the moral of this post is… it’s ok not to want to go to a music festival, it doesn’t make you weird if you don’t go. In fact it shows that you’re an individual who doesn’t follow the crowds!


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